I Am the Very Model of a Modern Fly Fishing Guide...

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I Am the Very Model of a Modern Fly Fishing Guide...

Thursday, July 12. 2007

I Am the Very Model of a Modern Fly Fishing Guide
(with apologies to Sirs Gilbert and Sullivan)

I am the very model of a modern fly-fishing guide,
I've information on each sandbar, trouty run, and fishy glide,
I am conversant in all matters ichthyological,
From whitefish to salar - in order categorical.

I am very well acquainted, too, with elementary Latin,
Each fish and bug I can describe, as well as what you sat in,
When tying knots I know the best and am not loathe to show you,
I even tie them in white water... when I should just try to row you.

As master of the arcane art of graceful "shadow casting",
I quote the book - and give the look - of Redford everlasting.
Not for me the whitened beak from tame zinc oxide smears,
My nose is red and blistered - from the sun and all the beers.

I entertain my "sports" with axioms, new and classical,
"You can give a man a fish.." seems to me entirely practical,
'Cause I can't teach these louts to fish or even cover a rise,
But I can smile as I cut their fly from the flesh beneath my eyes.

I am the very model of a modern fly fishing guide,
I will listen, I will teach you - standing always by your side,
But please no stories of l'amor or all your Freudian wishes,
I only want a tip from you - and to help you catch the fishes.

Posted by Reed F. Curry in Fishing Humor at 10:40 | Comment (1) | Trackbacks (0)

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And if I have cause to yell,
It shall be akin to the brimstone of Hell,

As thine attention is on yon sunbathing lass,
Not on the hook thee imbedded in mine a__

#1 kbarton10 (Homepage) on 2007-07-14 06:45 (Reply)

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